Saturday, June 4, 2011
Dave Mustaine's tedious autobiography exists
Apparently this is a real thing. I was skimming through Blabbermouth for reasons I can't fully explain when I ran across this tidbit. Apparently Mustaine's book is getting released as a paperback, not just getting released in general. The hardcover has already happened! It goes without saying that if you ever find a hardcover copy of Dave Fucking Mustaine's autobiography on someone's bookshelf, burning down their home is a completely reasonable response. I want to be surprised that something like this is actually being read by people in the real world, but I'm far too jaded to deny it anymore. It's a hideous mockery of the written word, I'm sure.
In metal, a scene which ostensibly has a lot of its roots in the DIY philosophy espoused by punk, we sure are addicted to forming relentless cults of personality around larger-than-life celebrity types like Mustaine. Now metal's also an elitist genre, so I can see people revering, say, Varg Vikernes, Tom Warrior, people like those, but fucking Dave Mustaine? A man whose entire contribution to the musical world has been terrible thrash albums that shouldn't be listened to after one enters puberty? Someone who's been repeatedly proven so hypocritical, so anti-metal, and so agonizingly self-righteous and egotistical? This is one of our heroes?
Well, he's not mine, and it disgusts me to think that people like Mustaine actually form the face of heavy metal to a great number of people. I can only imagine what the book contains (since I'm not going to be reading it), but I can guess a few: tedious, half-remembered stories of drug and alcohol abuse, self-loathing manifested through rage at Metallica, and an obsessive retconning of the past in favor of something which portrays himself in a more sympathetic light. Dave Mustaine is basically metal's James Frey, but people still take him seriously because his position in the oldschool thrash scene is actually quite similar to Oprah's Book Club.
I guess what really impresses me is that he's still able to pull stunts like these when everyone in the metal scene hates him. Seriously, I haven't run into a single person who thinks that Dave Mustaine is an interesting, intelligent, or even good person. So who's buying this book? I know it's none of you reading this blog of all things, but tell me, have you ever encountered a FAN of Mustaine's?